What goes 99 clunk? A centipede with a wooden leg.
What is green and goes up and down? A gooseberry in a lift.
What is yellow and highly dangerous? Shark infested custard.
What is black and white and read all over? A newspaper.
We loved shaggy dog stories. These were long drawn-out tales that ended with a corny punchline. My brother's favourite one was about a little cornflake that always wanted to be on the top of the pile. Of course he got eaten first, but after ten minutes of telling the story. My mum's favourite was about a guru going on a long spiritual journey looking for the secret of the Poy. After a long time he arrives at a hut on top of the Himalayas . There he finds an old bearded man. At last he'll discover the elisir of life. "Yes" says the old man,"we've got Poy, apple poy, shepherds poy, pecan poy."